So I just took off, grumbling to myself as I drove that wasn't that just typical of my family. If i had forgot HER birthday, I'd never hear the end of it.

I get to the office and Janet says, "Happy Brithday, sir!" and I thought, well, at least SHE remembered.

At noon Janet says "You know, sir, it's a lovely day and with it being your birthday, what would you say if I asked you to lunch with me?"

Well, I found the idea intriguing, so I figured, why not? We went somewhere quiet, so we are alone, and truth to tell, it was most pleasant being in the company of such a lovely girl. The meal was pleasant too, and Janet suggested a martini.

So we have one or two martinis, then I suggestted a brandy. I think it was at this point I started behaving just a little silly. I complained that I had the most selfish wife in the world and dear Janet said I was not to talk about my good lady in such a way. I said that's very honourable, but she must know I am telling the truth.

She then says, "Look, why don't you and I go to my place?"

Well! I was so taken aback I didn't know what to say. This beautiful creature wanting to take me, this middle aged man, to her place? I reckoned she felt sorry for me. Well, hang it, I was sorry for me too. I said of course!

We got a taxi and went to her apartment. She led me into the living room, where she prepared some more drinks and she started to giggle. "I bet you thought today would never turn out to be a good one. But I promise you a birthday you'll never forget. Now, I need to go and, well, get something very special for you. I'll be back in a moment."

My excitement rose and rose. Ten minutes went by and she came back in the room with a giant birthday cake, my wife and all my children.

And I was sitting there wearing nothing but my socks!